Ernesto

I was initially kind of disappointed that Ernesto didn't go by a nickname, until I learned that his real name is Todd. Todd Mitchell Smith. He told me (during an in depth exclusive interview one on one from the Alameda County Jail) that he chose Ernesto because "it really captures the essence of the spirit of struggle that resides within me" and he got pretty offended when I "accidentally" called him Todd. I bet he was sooooo pissed when he realized how lame of a name he had compared to his fellow tree brethren.

So, Ernesto was born in Chula Vista, Ca. His father sold timeshares, his mother worked on and off as a school secretary. You could not have had a more middle of the road, middle class childhood. His parents shared a love of Mexican food and the San Diego Chargers, and some of young Todd's first memories are of being awakened before dawn on Sunday mornings to load up the family minivan and head to the stadium on game days. As a result, Todd resented football from a very early age.

While attending the local public high school, Todd developed a passionate crush on a girl named Veronica, a vegetarian. As a result, Todd became a vegetarian himself as he devoted himself to learning anything/everything about the environment and PETA, Veronica's two passions. While he could never fully get her to commit (she was hot enough not to have to date him) she did let him do her after prom their senior year. After all, they were friends. Veronica got into Cal, which is what brought Ernesto (albeit years later) to Berkeley.

For awhile, Todd bummed around the Cal State Dominguez Hills scene, taking enough classes to get a degree within three years, although he never filed the paperwork to graduate. He figured that would annoy his "disturbingly uninteresting" parents. To be honest, they were just sad they didn't raise a Chargers fan.

After college, Todd took the money he'd saved working at the local Red Lobster throughout college and decided to travel around the US with his buddy Leonard (hippie name: Leapfrog) in the only family minivan. They decided after a trip to Seattle to stop by and meet up with Veronica who was, Todd discovered, much less hot after high school.

To make a long story short, Veronica had gotten involved with a lot of anarchists on campus, and one of their members was friends with Runningwolf (he's a whole nother story, wikipedia him some time to get some wack-ass quotes) who taught them about the tree sitting situation. Ernesto, as he decided to be called, felt a calling immediately, and was one of the first wave of tree sitters up in the trees and as we saw today, the last one out.

Ernesto found it relatively easy living in the trees. Because of the multitude of tailgating parties he attended as a child and a sulky adolescent, he was very proficient at peeing in an empty soda bottle in close quarters. He felt a grandiose sense of self importance because of the whole "doing something good for the environment and for the Native American spirits buried under the beautiful oak grove" and he is pretty sure, he confided in me, that Veronica will let him do her again after his grandparents post his bail.

Viva Ernesto, nee Todd!